Here at Speakeasy, we have most definitely taken sides in the War on Christmas. Santa vs. Jesus? Not only does our boy have a significant weight advantage - he's got a philosophical one as well. Under Santa, the world is an orderly place: Be good, do homework, brush teeth, get loot. Repeat yearly. What other force could keep a country full of sugar-bombed youth in line? Certainly not the complicated ethos we had to grind through a whole other day of school on Sunday for. At their core, the shysters and politicians of this land have not made a pact with Satan. They've forsaken the one they made with Santa.
But if you are in the giving mood (Santa forbid), then how's this for a party: This Speakeasy will also be our first ever White Elephant Bookshelf Bash. Got a book you need cleared off your shelf? Wrap it up, bring it along and add it to the pile. Every one of our readers will get to pick their own gift from under the tree, and believe me - your host has been stocking up some damn good books, from the rare to the ridiculous.
That's 9 p.m. Dec. 20 at Will's Pub, boys and girls. Belly up for a night that will ensure you sleep right through those three pesky ghosts.