July 19: The Karaoke Edition

Let's face it, y'all: Spoken word people are frustrated singers. Not many of us grew up bouncing on our bed, lip-syncing Gil Scott-Heron or Maggie Estep (not enough of us, anyway). So here we are, years later, no roadies or groupies ... but at least they're listening to the words. Right?

But let's put on our big boy pants and acknowledge the inspiration, shall we? For July, we're doing what all great musicians have done since before Elvis: Stealin'. Specifically, we're stealin' J. Bradley's gimmick and doing poems and stories about a song. See, J's working on a book where each poem is based on an Afghan Whigs song and ... what? J. Who? Get over here and get to know him, then come back. Try and keep up, people. Jeez.

Anyway, easy theme, right? Pick a song. Write a little something about what it means to you, where you were when you first heard it. Re-arrange/riff on/fuck up the lyrics. Sound like fun? Get on over to Will's Pub on July 19 at 9 p.m. to taste our musical fruits. (Cue fart noise.)

June 21: The Housebroken Edition

Your host has never been a dog person. Or a cat person, or anything, really. I'm really more of an uncle about pets - I love other people's animals, and they seem to like me, but I've lived with enough roommate's critters to know they're an awfully expensive route to affection. Beats a strip club habit though, and at least they'll sleep with you afterward.

Still, animals can tell us a lot about ourselves. They're one of the few tangible examples of unconditional love (well, dogs are) and they're how a lot of people first learn about death (my first and only gerbil once crawled into my mini-billiards table and never came out, sob). And so it is that the theme for June is Pets. This is either going to be a particularly hilarious or heartbreaking Speakeasy; probably a little of both. You know how we do.

Bonus: For the second month in a row, we've got someone I think is going to be a mighty fine feature performer. Teacher and poet Robert Walker will be joining us for an extended set, riding high off the publication of "The Bouyancy of It All," his debut collection. His rockstar credentials are enhanced by the fact that he's bringing his brother along to back up his set on drums. Not bongos, you useless hippie. Real man-size drums. But hey, he already had us at "bouyancy." Need a little more convincing? Solid interview here with Walker, including some samples of his poetry.

So it's settled, then? 9 p.m.-ish this Tuesday, June 21? Splendid. We'll see you then.

- Tod

May 17: The Playtime Edition

This just in from our researchers at Speakeasy Institute: Winning is not actually everything. Matter is composed of bajillions of tiny objects flying around, frequently bumping into bigger objects and exploding, or "losing," thereby delivering energy to the universe. Losers are filling the hungry bellies of winners in the jungles, or sinking into the earth to to be squeezed into the oil we need to more effectively operate our winning machines.

Long story short: Games are important, and that's why games are the subject of our Speakeasy for May. From Rock-paper-scissors to Call of Duty, Marco Polo to that thing we do where we pretend not to sell weapons to bad guys, everybody plays. Poets and writers are invited to sign up for the open mike and give their take on games and gamers of every rank and flavor. Level up on May 17 at Will's Pub (where else?) around 9 p.m. Free as usual.

Bonus plugs! Your harried host will be reading his short stories at the first ever edition of There Will Be Words on May 10 at Urban ReThink. And - 24 hours after this month's Speakeasy - it's the kickoff of the Orlando Fringe Festival, featuring Tod's Poetry Smackdown and a special edition of the Toast-Off on the outdoor stage. And be sure to drop by the Poetry Vending Machine, where plenty of Speakeasy regulars will be marinating in beer throughout the Festival.

April 19: The Unnatural Edition

Holy crap, do we have a lot of people to thank for this past Speakeasy. Great crowd and consistently solid readers, not least of which were our last-minute guests from Burrow Press. Special thanks to Ryan Rivas, Jana Waring and Gene Albamonte for dropping by. We'll be seeing them again, with any luck. Little taste of what you missed? Head over to Jana's blog for the full text of Gene's offering for The Divine Edition.

Bit of a long breather between Speakeasies this time, owing to an early week for March. Plenty of time for you to tackle the theme for April, then: Man vs. Nature. Thanks to Arnie Ellis and Curtis Meyer for this one, in which we turn for inspiration to that mother of all mothers ... Gaia. Like most moms, she has her hot flashes, occasionally smothers us and has an amaaaazing rack.

No, wait. That's your Mom. Anyway. Earth week or no earth week, April 19 is the day to show that bitch what's up. Writers are challenged to address the theme of conflict against the natural world. What animal would you most like to fight? What fast-food franchise would best serve the rainforest? You get the idea. And to really rub it in, you should go ahead and write your piece on a dead tree.

April 19! 9:30! Will's Pub, where else?

-Tod

The Divine Edition

Good Lord, it's been a long time between updates. And speaking of the Lord ... Speakeasy comes at you a week early this month with The Divine Edition. March 8, the monthly theme is religion. Why? Hey, the last few themes (sex, murder) have been something everybody can agree on. Let's get something in there that might start a war or two, shall we?

In the meantime (or post-time, in case I end up sleeping on this blog for another month), feel free to send in any pics from Speakeasies past, or even poems and stories if you don't mind throwing them out there. I'll post 'em up and we can all see how they look in the cold light of morning.

Keep on,
Tod

Speakeasy Holiday Toast-Off

Drinking? Sure, it's OK. But this, oh my children, is America (fuck yeah). And there is nothing that can't be improved on with a little healthy competition. So it is that Speakeasy presents it's perennial holiday favorite: The Toast-Off. On Tuesday, Dec. 21 at 9:30 p.m., eight of the funniest patsies your host could find will engage in a competitive toasting match. No, not the toast you eat with eggs. The kind you do with a drink in your hand.

This ingeniously stupid idea was first thunk up by touring poet Christian Drake, and it involves a little improv, a little poetry and a lot of hangover. Competitors will face off head-to-head, composing on-the-spot toasts to a variety of subjects pulled out of a hat. The funniest/cleverest/poignant-est toast wins, as decreed by our panel of celebrity judges. Best of three goes on to the next round. Do the math, and this adds up to a lot of drinking, both for our competitors and for the crowd that happens to be toasting along. We'd tell you how much fun this was when we did it at the Fringe Festival last May, but we don't remember a goddamn thing.

Tuesday. Dec. 21. 9:30 p.m. Free. No excuses. There may well be the usual open mike later, pending consciousness.

Team-Up week!

The advantages of attending the National Poetry Slam are manifold. A whole week of rad poetry. Radder poets. Booze. Honor. Glory. Booze. There's just one downside: It's expensive as a motherfucker.

Your host is a three year veteran of this little circus, and he hasn't forgotten about that part. So it is that he'll be inviting his teammates in the Orlando Slam Poetry Team to knock y'all out with their best poems next Tuesday. And they'll have copies of the exclusive 2010 team chapbook available for sale, so you can in turn knock us out with kindness. Come see Kendra Corrie, Curtis Meyer, Ronin, Shannon Kortbek and yours truly pull out the stops. Yes, there'll be a sign-up for the open mike as well. Admission free as always, but bring a little extra scratch if you'd like a chapbook. It's quality stuff, and helps a broke-ass team represent your burg.

9:30 pm! Tuesday July 20! Will's Pub!

And! If you've got any steam left that week, hop across the street to the Peacock Room on Thursday, July 22 at 9:30 pm for a Masquerade Ball benefit for Emotions Dance Company. Their next show in October is a "Poetry in Motion" collaboration with J. Bradley, Curtis Meyer and Tod Caviness. Screw suffering for art - give us purty gals dancing to our poetry! Get a preview of that sort of thing at the benefit show, featuring drinks, costumes, and spoken word by the aforementioned cool people.